WHY SERVE HIM IN THE FIRST PLACE?

Now, to today’s post. The topic has been twirling in my head for a couple of days as I try to find answers. The issue is simple: why do some women provide ‘domestic help’ to their boyfriends and end up citing these 'help' as regrets or a bargaining chip for a come-back when the relationship ends? It is unusual to hear, after a breakup- between lovers- what each party did for the other. Most often, the complaints are not much on the ‘big’ things the person did but the ‘smaller’ things they did freely for their lover.

Often, after a break up, one does hear some ladies whine about the domestic help they offered their men (among others) during the course of the relationship. These domestic help run from cooking, ‘providing’ him sex, washing and cleaning for him.

I don’t quite get why such ‘I-Did-This-For-Him’ list is often put on the table. Is it to win sympathy from the listening ear or it is to prove how ungrateful the guy is in breaking up with her?

And to the question on my mind: why do they do it-the chores? Is it something on or part of the ‘courtship’ broucher? Or it is done to prove how ‘marriageable' a material she is? Or is something that is deemed a custom to behold once you are in it? Or is it to prove how much they love the person?

I’m just asking questions. I might be called Swaye but I got no answers people.

As far as my opinions holds, there is no construct that binds or dictates to a lady to undertake such domestic chores for her man, a man whom she is not married to no matter how much she loves him. Anything one decides to do for their partner is their own decision and whatever the consequences during or after the relationship is their own to shoulder.

Unless you are cajoled or acquiesced into doing it, you have no business to complain, slander, and insult the guy for taking advantage of you. Remember, no guy would close his mouth when honey is dripping into it, as the Akan adage goes. As selfish human beings, we want to have people who would serve as even when we don’t deserve it or know it is unjustifiable.  

Making and warming his bed, cooking for him, sleeping with him, doing his laundry is not a measure of how much you love him or any justifiable reason for him to wed you. It is something you choose or decide to do so there is no reason to trump it up when the relationship goes south. You decided to play his ‘wife’ when indeed you are not his legit wife. Stop complaining!